Here at Deadspin, we wrote a lot of crap about cucumber pickle that I feel bad demeaning Americans for exercising. If you want to spend the summer playing giant table tennis, that’s okay. Sweat it out, burn some calories, and spend $89.95 on a paddle that’s sure to stay dust-free for six months like the trendy workout gear that came out before it.
All I ask are masses that can impress stop pressing PHandball for real sports fans/players — and to clarify if they’re called PHandball ball, or pthorn ball. (A bit of an exaggeration, but pickles sound like venereal disease so I can understand the reticence.)
Two such people promoting the sport like overzealous car salesmen are former MLB executives Mike Dee and Bob Bowman. Dee, who held senior business roles with the San Diego Padres and Boston Red Sox, and Bowman, former president and chief executive officer of MLB Advanced Media, leveraged their incredible industry acumen to bring to a series of football fields PHandball.
Yes, very similar to the NHLStadium series of, Pickleball4America will hold events at MLB stadia nationwide. Boston’s Fenway, San Francisco’s Oracle Park and Denver’s Coors Field will be invaded by professional and amateur athletes alike to enhance the visibility of an activity growing at an unprecedented rate since the activity boom of the 1970s. (Not sure if that’s accurate, but Mike D. said yes, and I have never questioned a member of the Beastie Boys. Also, shout out loud anchor for the historically accurate “Soft J” running joke.)
This got me thinking: What other sport should be placed on the baseball diamond in the name of growth and capitalism?