His Story/Her Story: “I Think My Husband Is Gay”

Her story: We had an arranged marriage and now have children, but I have a feeling my husband is gay and he married me to hide it from his family. I have a gay friend and whenever he comes to our party he tells me that my husband is obviously gay and that he is hiding this marriage. I loved him, he took care of me, and it is true that now that I think about it, we rarely had sex, but he was such a devoted and good father to me. I am confused, unsure and on the verge of being devastated if this is true. I don’t know how to handle this situation. I tried to ask him but he was offended. Please help.

His story: I care about my wife and love her too but the truth is I love men too. I realized this very late after my marriage that I was bisexual. She confronted me recently but I was horrified to learn that she thought I was gay and that our marriage was a front. I really don’t know what to say… I hid my embarrassment with aggression and we fought. I know this is unfair to my wife and I should let her know before she completely thinks about another conclusion. We also have a beautiful child and I fear I will lose both if I tell her I turn both ways. I don’t know how she will react.

Expert Advice by Nidhi Behl Vats – Founder at Storyofsouls

For Her: What do I feel is the most important thing to understand about being gay/bisexual? They’re human too, it’s just that they’re more comfortable with people of the same sex. This is no longer taboo, if it turns out to be true. Could you be his soul mate, if you knew this… how does this affect your life and emotions? In my opinion, it shouldn’t. Because he cares about you, he is a good human being and has been fulfilling all his rituals and duties properly. He is very much in the relationship. I feel that if you accept him, he will be happier with you, as a partner. However, if you feel that your husband is not right for you, you can talk to him without making him uncomfortable.

For him: It’s the best part where you’ve discovered your reality. That is the first step. However, now you have to talk to your wife about this fact. Because truth is the basis of any relationship. If she can’t understand you then it’s not good to live a double life. And if she understands you, then you are the happiest. Make sure you decide and get her to trust, and make the final call. Since you are married, the decision should be made by both husband and wife. Relationships are delicate things that we need to take care of. After all, this is the question of everyone’s life, including your family.

Aaira kaurr, Self Love advisor at Aanya Wellness: To maintain a marriage, it takes effort from both sides. Honesty, respect, and love are key ingredients to maintaining it. Concealing, lying, or manipulating the truth shakes the foundation of a relationship and makes it difficult to trust each other and have happy relationships at the same time. So it’s important to give each other space and communicate clearly and honestly about what you think and feel, and help your partner accept reality and figure out how to live a life together. mutually beneficial to both. As truth cannot be changed but only accepted and adjusted to live with it.

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