Over the holidays, we’ll be re-publishing some of our best features, interviews, opinions, and views from 12 months ago. from employees and contributors alike – articles that we feel represent the best of the year 2021. In them you’ll find our usual blend of thoughtfulness, vanity, nostalgia specialize, nostalgia for gaming, and – of course – enthusiasm for all things Nintendo. Interesting!
The Metroid series now in its 35th year, and in that long span of time, Nintendo has happily built everything from a star’s childhood to a gruesome parent-murder nightmare Ridley, Metroids, Chozo, and even humanity evil version created by Phazon. In short, pretty much every lore you can think of has been over-explained, elaborated, elaborated in the sequel, and then given a well-defined place in the sequel. Metroid canon expansion.
All, no one except. Correct working of Samus’ Morph Ball ability – a key element of the series from the first few minutes of first game – still shrouded in mystery. Official information remains conspicuously absent on the finer details of this popular skill. “Collect this to give Samus the Morph Ball ability“,”Press this button to make her roll into a ball“Saying that games don’t have to matter in form, it’s as if such simple tutorials could quench our thirst for sci-fi ball-related metamorphic knowledge.
How it works? What happened to the poor souls who tested the archetypes? What bird brain scientist would have looked at that iconic armor and thought “You know what this massive rocket power suit needs? Curled up into a micro-ball so it can roll wherever it likes. And who on Earth (or SR-388, or Zebes, or any where) looked the person in the eye and said “Yes, it’s a great idea and you definitely don’t have to go and lie down for a bit”?
What does it feel like to roll around inside an orange metal ball on the surface of an alien planet or sink in lava? Nintendo won’t say anything, so we have to come up with a few theories of our own…
#1 The “Cronenbergian Body Horror”
Capturing the soul of Occam’s Almighty Razor, we can assume the simplest theory is correct: Samus can roll into a ball because her body transforms into a transparent, convenient sphere the time of her inhuman revolutions, turning into a Mass of Liquid and broken bone that was then restored to its original state after she finished rolling thanks to the Chozo technology – which we usually indistinguishable from very convenient magic.
Her eyes and brain could have remained intact and gyro-stabilized for the duration of this activity, because how would she know where she was going? She would let out a scream of unimaginable pain like blood if she still had her mouth left, but luckily for those involved she didn’t.
This is the real reason why Nintendo never tells us everything, because if they did, Metroid fans all over the world would have nightmares for years. It’s enough to make you wonder why she can’t just crawl.
#2 Theory “The Unity of the Electric Chozo”
Lucky Metroid Prime offers a less gruesome alternative to the viscera above. The 3D rendering of Samus fills the void in the middle of the Morph Ball’s plating with an eye-catching glow… um, things.
We can only conclude that Samus has been transformed into a pure form of energy, her mind and body reaching a special spherical sense state. We assume that the lack of anything that traditionally approaches a body keeps her from feeling nauseous as she relentlessly spins and accelerates around the curved surfaces of Tallon IV (and elsewhere) during when it’s all shiny, though if she can somehow carry her uneaten lunch from the emptiness of her stomach through her mouth that isn’t hers to her selflessness, can anyone know?
Defenders of this theory point to an interesting philosophical state dubbed Schroedinger’s Vom, where she is simultaneously covered with both disease and does not become ill until she reverts to her standard human form. me.
#3 “Samus shrunk” theory
Samus operated the Transform Orb by shrinking to an appropriate size at will, again thanks to Chozo magi’s nifty and inexplicable powers— er, Technology.
From here, two main schools of thought emerged and then quickly branched out in different directions. Some believe that she runs in the ball like a hamster for exercise, the suit’s often translucent armor being the only thing that protects her dignity, while others argue that a tiny Samus sitting in a small Samus-sized swivel chair and using the controls of a console – the right shape to navigate the world around her, all viewed through a glittering screen same.
Both theories satisfactorily explain another mystery: how she managed to store an infinite supply of small wall-destroying bombs that she somehow carried with her. everywhere. If she could shrink herself, she could probably shrink them too, automatically re-rendering them whenever she needed to blow a hole in the floor or increase the height a bit.
This also raises the possibility that the entire Chozo race is actually completely fine and living the way they’re used to, with population-wide shrinking technology crashing down to them. Picori ratio.
#4 The “Hey buddy, Samus-chu!” Theory
As we all know Samus is the best thing ever is and she really has to catch them all – as long as “all” are Space Pirates and/or Metroid. Therefore, it only makes sense that the Morph Ball is in fact based on high-end Poké Ball technology.
And as we all know, Poké Balls work because… they work because… they work a lot like Morph Balls, maybe.
Assuming this theory is true allows us to come to two very important conclusions. One; The Samus timeline is a dystopian future where famed Pokémon trainer Ash was killed at a pivotal moment in history, allowing Ridleyanni and the Space Pirates to take over. And two; inside of Morph Ball is extremely comfortable.
Rumor has it that our space-hunting heroine didn’t speak in the previous games because she hasn’t learned to pronounce anything other than “CONGRATULATION! Oh my God! Samussamus?“Currently unproven.
#5 The “It’s Just a Convenient Gaming Device” Theory
We will include this purely out of sympathy for those who believe it, rather than because it has any real merit.
There are people out there who claim “It’s not that deep, nerdAnd Samus is shaped like a ball because it is a small and portable shape, just a shape that is instantly recognizable at any resolution and requires little or no animation. actually to scroll around the screen convincingly.
We strongly urge such misguided individuals to reconsider the alternatives above, or at least point us to a log entry they believe supports such an extravagant idea. this.
Which of these theories do you think is most likely to be true, or do you have a completely different idea? Ever wanted Nintendo to explain that? Let us know by voting in the poll below and scroll down to the comments to drop your own Power Bomb…
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